A spontaneous decision to jump into a bouncy castle changed my life.
What started as harmless fun ended with three broken bones in my foot. As my body worked to heal from the injury, blood clots quietly formed in my leg—deep vein thrombosis (DVT). I had no warning signs. No pain. No swelling.
Then I began having difficulty breathing. At first, I brushed it off as stress—but over time it worsened, until one day I could barely breathe at all.
That’s when I learned the truth: I had extensive pulmonary emboli throughout my lungs.
The clots didn’t resolve quickly. They took nearly nine months to break down—far longer than expected—and during that time, they took so much from me. A job I loved. Plans I had been looking forward to (goodbye, Eras Tour). My sense of normalcy.
What surprised me most wasn’t just the physical toll—it was the mental one.
The mental health impact of surviving pulmonary embolisms was the hardest thing I have ever faced. When I tried to return to work, I quickly realized I wasn’t physically or mentally ready.
I immediately felt like I had failed. I pushed myself with unrealistic expectations, and that pressure only made healing harder.
Blood clots are serious and life-threatening—and recovery is not just physical. Your body and your mind both need time to heal, and neither can be rushed without negative consequences.
With the help of supportive therapists, I came to understand what I was experiencing as a post-PE adjustment disorder. I’m now working closely with professionals on a recovery plan, and while progress can feel slow, I see it every day.
A health crisis has a way of amplifying existing vulnerabilities in our lives. As a chronically anxious person, my PEs magnified this condition tenfold. I have a long way to go—but I’m making progress in my healing journey by being kinder to myself and being proud of my body for surviving.
Very few people know about how dangerous DVT and PEs are. Hearing about other people’s stories through the National Blood Clot Alliance has been incredibly helpful in making me feel less alone.
